Tuesday 31 March 2009

A weekend of total hurricane busyness and deep forest quiet.

Yaaaawwwwnnnn.

Man I'm tired! What a weekend! It's been an insane blend of manic, stressful mania followed by serene calm and peace. Talk about one extreme to the other.

On friday night we recorded our bit of the new CCK album. We were at the building all day, working on backing vocals, setting up equipment, sound-checking and rehearsing for the live recording in the evening. The session we had turned out to be short and really intense. Stuart Townend had just recorded and we got on stage and played through the songs, having to repeat some of them because of technical issues or mistakes from the band...It was intense, stressful, and mentally exhausting. Playing keys and singing is one thing, but somehow the added tension of being recorded for an album that will be heard by thousands of people all over the world made things a little bit more interesting! The 30 minutes on stage getting those songs were 30 of the most draining minutes that i've had in a long time!

Then it was time to quickly exchange some computer files with Bex (who btw did an amazing job singing on the album, check it out when the album is released!) and swap our computers for a week. (I'm posting this on her iMac rather than my Macbook) before an emotional goodbye. She is away in Wales at a conference with Phatfish, and we won't be seeing much of each other for the next few weeks. This is a hard thing when marriage is 3 months away!) I on the other headed home to pack for a weekend in Sweden and a stag weekend in the forests near Fellingsbro. We departed at 2am and so It was a race to get some sleep before the flight....The sleep never came.

Having travelled to Stansted airport, attempting to sleep in the car (the sleep still wasn't happening!) and still exhausted from a full and intense day before, we got on board the cramped and swelteringly warm flight to Stockholm. The chances of sleeping on that flight, despite exhaustion were slim, largely due to the sauna like temperature on board and the amount of legroom, which I'm convinced must be unlawful. The Fraggles would struggle to get comfy on that plane. We arrived in Sweden in the early hours of the morning and made the drive to where were staying, in the woods near the home of some friends that Mark, (the stag) had become friends with. Staying awake on sheer adrenaline, we were served Elk meat (by a gentle giant of a man called Per Andersson) for lunch. That's when it caught up with me that I was no longer in Brighton. After lunch it became clear that sleep was not on the cards until that night, and so it would be another whole day until sleep came...

To speed up this account somewhat, here are some key elements that the remainder of the day and weekend consisted of;

More elk meat, a military tent and wood stove, snow, camping on the ground in the dense forest of Sweden amidst elk, lynx, and even wolves, a barbecue, an evening of coffee and swedish beer and laughter lit only by a nearby campfire, whisky, some sleep interrupted by my hour shift of fire-watch, a tramp through some Swedish wilderness accompanied by an epic snowball fight, the meeting of us English city lads with a true viking of a man (who looked like a character from an Asterix comic!) who introduced us to his bow and arrow collection (I spent most of the first afternoon honing my long bow skills, and completely fell in love with the feeling of firing arrows from this primitive weapon in the middle of a snowy Scandinavian paradise), more Elk meat, some whisky, an hour spent chopping firewood with an axe, a look around a hundred-year old house full of ancient Swedish artifacts  (not a museum, a real old house that has been left for decades untouched), a visit to the town of Orebro and some more great Swedish coffee, and ALOT of camaraderie with some great guys. The contrast of life there in the forest and life in England was totally inescapable.

The time in Sweden was amazing. The absence of phones, the internet and any technology whatsoever, was replaced with a profoundly serene encounter with the Earth that we live on. We got wet with snow, muddy, smokey from the amount of wood we burned, sore fingered from the hours spent playing with real bow and arrows, we were confronted with the elements, forced to accommodate the cold, but wonderfully confronted with the serenity of life in the middle of nowhere. The stars in the sky were brighter and more numerous than i've ever seen. It was glorious. The forest was beautiful, peaceful and completely convincing. In that I mean to say that the forest and the wilderness is the real thing, not concerned with Google or The Apprentice, having no time for materialism and noise. It reminded that there really is more to life on this planet than the shallow lives we fall into living in Western culture. 

In the forest where we camped, television, education, money and all the other unfortunate vices of civilization became entirely irrelevant and totally trivial. I felt strongly that God wanted me to come away feeling a sense of peace and refreshing that will equip me for the manic things that go on in Brighton. He really spoke to me again about finding time to escape the pressures of this age, finding a place of serenity in which to meet him, a place where the noise of life is gone, where his voice can be heard, no longer drowned out by everything and everyone else that I get distracted by.

Finally, the weekend got me very excited about my pending marriage. Being with Mark a few weeks before his wedding and thinking about how he has been so incredibly blessed, really etched a feeling deep onto my spirit just how unbelievably blessed I am as well. I too have a wonderful wedding to look forward to very soon, a beautiful and wonderful fiancee, a great church, great friends to support us, and a great city to call home. 

I brought home some Elk meat (and reindeer too!) just to keep my feet on the ground until it runs out! 

Tuesday 24 March 2009

The most offensive message in history...

So...I’ve been provoked. Here goes. Apologies in advance.

 

I got carried away reading on the internet obituaries of the recently deceased Jade Goody, and also the Facebook page for two young teens from a school in the town in which I grew up who recently died in a gassing accident...Many of the comments left on these pages included people (friends, family, acquaintances) saying things like; "your with the angels now", "keep looking down on us from up there", "we're glad you're in a better place", (etc, you get the idea, you've all read this sort of thing before)...We’ve all see this kind of leaning towards a pseudo-spiritual awareness often in obituaries. If Jade and the two boys I mentioned didn’t ever put their faith in Jesus, (I don’t know for sure either way) then the truth is that they ARE NOT in heaven at all. They aren’t ‘resting in peace’, they aren’t ‘in a better place’ and all those well meaning and sentimental comments left by friends and family are in fact inappropriate and incongruent with reality. Offended? So were the blokes that crucified Jesus.

 

These obituary comments really intrigue me, and it would seem that they are indicative of a British (and perhaps global) tendency to suddenly assume a religiosity that appears only when a loved one dies, or say, when a baby gets Christened. The compulsion of otherwise complete pagans to swiftly affect the behavior of a person who does believe in heaven, hell, God, an afterlife etc is something that intrigues and, if I'm brutally honest, infuriates me. The countless friends who I know that have rejected God, expressed their staunch atheistic stance, and told me in no uncertain terms exactly what they think of Church and God (with expletives and raised voices!), are often the very same people who write the aforementioned spiritually infused obituaries, or who heartily approve of infant Christening in a purely religious context. This kind of fickle, religious hypocrisy is frankly baffling. In our age of The Times newspaper and Question time, many are vying to be affiliated with those enlightened to ‘the truth’ that God is nonsensical. Yet the very same people still go to Church on Christmas Day, and get their loved ones blessed in a church funeral service. Why is that? What I don't intend to do in this entry is come across as a sanctimonious preachy know-it-all, because ultimately we're all totally, miserably lost and confused without Jesus (and I'm no better than the worst). But I would like to submit that the Bible has quite a lot to say about this kind of thing...and most of it's actually quite negative.

 

...God hates religion. He hates it. He despises the self-righteous, he rejects piety, those who so wrongly assume that God’s favour can be appeased by an annual visit to Church for midnight mass. Perhaps to the surprise of some is that God could ever feel hatred. Well he does. The Bible is really really clear about this. Talking about this facet of God’s character is very unpopular, essentially because it make us uncomfortable with our own behaviour. In Isaiah, the Bible describes our righteous works as ‘a filthy rag’ (other translations have interpreted the text as ‘used menstrual cloths’) Either way, God clearly doesn’t like religiosity!

 

Amos 5;21 is even more clear; “I hate, I despise your feasts, and take no delight in your solemn assemblies…I will not accept your peace offerings…take away the noise of your songs…to your melodies I will not listen”. The context for this passage is that for the first time in generations, Israel is experiencing peace. It becomes a materialistic nation in which luxuries are readily available. (sound familiar?!) Amid this peace and prosperity, one lone voice, Amos, scrapes like fingers on a blackboard. Amos, the simple farmer, is addressing the people with plenty of ‘religion’. They went to shrines for worship and looked forward to ‘the day of the Lord’ when God would fulfill all their expectations. Amos brings unexpected, offensive news from God; namely that he hated their religiosity amidst such hedonism and materialism. (A materialism that came at the expense of the poor and oppressed) Their belief in him was purely ritualistic and ceremonial.

 

In the spirit of the Amos the farmer, and to attempt to draw a conclusion from this rant, I would like to submit two considerations;

 

1)  1) That Great Britain is in the same state as post-war Israel. We are still a country steeped in religiosity and the imperialism of ‘high church’ culture amidst selfish, hedonistic materialistic Western ideals. Despite ever increasing atheism, ceremonial Christianity is rife. Infant Christenings are common. Belief in God in this nation comes only when and if it is needed. The people of Britain possess a startlingly capricious disposition when it comes to God.

 

      2) That Jesus Christ alone is the solution. Jesus brings peace between sinful hypocrites and a God who hates our superficial offerings. He died and brought an end to eternal punishment for sin for anyone willing to receive it. God’s grace and mercy has come to us through him. Deep down I am exactly the same as the sort of people that Amos warns so starkly. I get caught up in our culture, our films, our music, our materialism and our hedonism. I go to church and worship God but often without the sort of radical heart of justice and humility that I should have. My attitude is often wrong. My actions are often appalling, and I probably slip in religiosity more than I care to even acknowledge. But I know that despite this, God sees me as perfect, purely because of the fact that I’m hidden in the shadow of the Cross. My filth is punished and dealt with, with Jesus taking the hit instead of me. This reality, this offer, is available to all people everywhere. I want to be a Christian who demonstrates real genuine patience and grace towards all people, particularly the superficial, insincere religious attitudes that I find so frustrating.

 

I want to shock people out of the naïve, illusory notion that being ‘Christened’ somehow guarantees a child’s ticket to heaven; IT DOESN’T….Or that attending Church once in a while will cover you; IT WONT. I want everyone to grasp and realise the simplicity that only belief and faith in Jesus’ accomplishment on the Cross WILL guarantee eternal life. Nothing else. 

Tuesday 17 March 2009

Spring has Sprung!!

With Spring firmly on the way, and in light of the recent beautiful weather, I thought i'd post one of my favourite bits of poetry about nature, wildlife, the joy of being in God's creation, the sights, smells and sounds of a walk through the countryside on a Spring day. Keats was a master of evocation, his words have a wonderfully ambrosial quality, you can almost smell and hear and taste what he describes. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

Save what from heaven is with the breezes blown 
Through verdurous glooms and winding mossy ways.
I cannot see what flowers are at my feet, 
Nor what soft incense hangs upon the boughs, 
But, in embalmed darkness, guess each sweet 
Wherewith the seasonable month endows 
The grass, the thicket, and the fruit-tree wild; 
White hawthorn, and the pastoral eglantine; 
Fast fading violets cover’d up in leaves; 
And mid-May’s eldest child, 
The coming musk-rose, full of dewy wine, 
The murmurous haunt of flies on summer eves. 


John Keats (Ode to a Nightingale 1817)

Monday 16 March 2009

The challenge and importance of solitude...

As you may or may not know (or care for that matter!) I am getting married in July this year. I am also in the closing stages of my Music degree and am still working a few days a week to make enough money to pay rent. Trying to deal with all this happening at once is a fun, challenging and exciting process! Life is awesome!! It's going really well, I'm feeling content, we're pretty organised in terms of wedding preparations, and the stress levels are something we make a conscious effort to maintain at a minimum. Amidst all this insanity though, there hasn't been an abundance in opportunity for solitude; Time spent alone with my thoughts, time in prayer, time to reflect on my identity in Christ. 

Piper says; We simply can't maintain a radical God-centeredness under an unbroken barrage of human interaction. The depth and value of what you bring in your heart to other people will depend on what you do with your solitude". 

Trying to find a place of solitude is hard sometimes. It's so valuable though. I have really learned recently the problems that arise when I get too entangled with the constant noise and traffic of the world and it's fast pace and busyness. Me and Bex recently resolved to make sure we get this time of peace, quiet and solitude that I had been so desperately lacking. I had been clinging too hard to the worldly things I'm involved in, afraid of letting them go to put God first, without realising that time with him is paramount, causing all other things to fall into their proper place. Time spent in His word realigns my perspective on all other aspects of life. Not only that, but it realigns my heart soul and mind to approach and live out my days with a better attitude, seeing more fruit than I did when I held tight to things other than God. 

The hymn writer James Thompson wrote these incredible words that sum all this up amazingly;    
                       
Hail, mildly pleasing solitude,
Companion of the wise and good:
Oh! how I love with thee to walk,
And listen to thy whisper'd talk,
Which innocence, and truth imparts,
And melts the most obdurate heart  

When the things that I'm doing (wedding plans, Uni work, Church ministry, seeing friends, making money, etc) become a distraction enough that the radiance of Jesus is blocked, it becomes like closing the curtains on the sun . The peace can no longer shine through all this traffic that I've put in place. In the darkness I wallow, losing the ability to see things clearly. My spiritual discernment is damaged, and like a mole in a tunnel, my eyes become accustomed to the dark. I begin to live as though this is the natural state.

 Resolving to seek more solitude, more time with God is like opening the curtains again. The light is blinding! Suddenly I am no longer fumbling my way around, trying to make everything work in the darkened conditions. Life has a clarity, a clearness. It is easier. I receive peace, strength and joy. The airwaves are clear again to hear God's correction, direction, purpose and love for me. God, the rock of ages, cleft for me, lets me hide myself in him. Like astronauts in a shuttle pod, I am enveloped in this place of security amidst immense pressure and hostility. I would be overwhelmed with the worries of this age, if I didn't have this place of solitude, security and protection.

The psalmist declares that; He makes me lie in pastures green, quiets me beside still waters and once in that place; He restores my soul.....Its significant that the Bible puts things in that order. We must be quiet, ready to listen in order that we can hear His voice. 





Tuesday 3 March 2009

25 things about me;

 Having read Luke Davydaitis’ recent post, I thought I would do the same. Here’s my self indulgent, horribly arrogant list of facts about me.

 1)       Having been born and raised in Wales, I do speak some Welsh. I have absolutely no entrenched jingoistic tendencies however.

 2)       I have never been particularly interested in football, despite the proclivity of the rest of mankind, who, for some reason, are.

 3)       I once walked straight into a highly polished patio door assuming it was an open passageway. Acutely and painfully embarrassing.

 4)       In my opinion, one of the most invigorating things to do on this lovely Earth is to sit atop a powerful jet ski and speedily traverse a stretch of Open Ocean. So. Much. Fun.

 5)       I once composed a piece of music that was played at the opening of the Welsh Opera house in Cardiff. Baritone Bryn Terfel told me he enjoyed it. Won’t be forgetting that moment.

 6)       I love cars. I go giddy at the sight of a powerful Italian sports car but become instantly filled with the agonizing and sinking feeling that I will never own or so much as drive, sit in, go near, or even smell the inside of an automobile of such calibre.

 7)       When I was 11, I was blinded in one eye for several months after an accident on bonfire night in which a blank bullet exploded and the shrapnel tore its merciless path through my left eyeball. True story. Scary times.

 8)       Speaking of horrendous injuries, my right foot was once impaled on the top of a spike, after I attempted to climb over a locked park gate. With sharp bits sticking up. Probably the most painful thing ever.

 9)       Some of my fondest memories as a child involve pouring over airfix models of wartime aircraft, and an 18th Century galleon. Complete with cannons. Awesome.

 10)  I’m a bluff old traditionalist. See previous blog entry for details.

 11)   The home I grew up in (in Wales) was once a 19th century, watermill powered wool factory.

 12)   The first live gig I ever went to was Sting at Cardiff Castle. It was brilliant. I’ve seen Eric Clapton live and got bored. That said, Music is a profound and deeply significant source of joy to me.

 13)   As a VERY YOUNG child, I did tap dancing and country dancing. As anyone who has known me since the 90s will testify, I did not pursue either.

 14)   I have 100% found the princess that I grew up dreaming about. I marry her in July and get to spend my life with her. Praise Jesus.

 15)   I would love to spend a good stint of my life somewhere other than the UK. Maybe the U.S. or Canada. We’ll see.

 16)   I have saved my younger brothers life twice. Something I will continue to use as a bargaining chip with him!

 17)   As a boy, I imagined playing the piano in front of my school assembly and thought that would be so cool. Last year I played in front of about 13,000 people in the space of a month. I have learned that it’s for an audience of one though. I’d rather play for God than a billion men any day.

 18)   I swam with dolphins and think it’s a bit over rated. Sorry.

 19)   Pear drops, sherbet-lemons and Welsh cakes are the taste of my childhood.

 20)  I have a canvas canoe that doesn’t get used. I have a wind-surfboard that doesn’t get used. I have a saxophone that doesn’t get played. I have books that I’ve never read and clothes that I’ve barely worn. I have so much junk.

 21)   I WILL see the Northern lights one day.

 22)  I wish I had started playing piano really, really young. Never mind.

 23)  The daily intake of Tea and Coffee will be one of the most important features of my life until the day I expire.

 24)  I know so little about this world. I think I should attempt to keep it that way in some regards. In others, I have a great deal yet to learn.

 25)  I am Samuel Mark Cox, born 1987 in South Wales. I have brown hair, eyes and ridiculously small ears.

Sunday 1 March 2009

A call for better mirrors.

The arts are amazing. Just amazing. The wealth of talent, skill and ability that pervade artistic endeavor the world over is just mind-blowing. The things that people can do these days, painting, sculpting, songwriting, computer-design and animation, photography and filmmaking have the capacity to completely inspire and often, totally beggar belief. For instance, there are musicians I have met over the years that can do seemingly superhuman things, applying their minds and fingers in such remarkable ways and with such speed, precision and creativity that my only response is to jaw-agapingly question how they possibly acquired such ability. For instance, to see a virtuoso at work is to witness a skill that supersedes the everyday notions of ‘talent’ that we so often encounter on our Saturday night X factor type programmes.

 From time to time we all come across art that makes us think "Wow. That's incredible". 

 The crux of this entry is that I have an increasing discontent with the quality of art that we in the western church produce and hence represent ourselves with to the watching world. Obviously that last statement is rather sweeping, and unfairly overlooks the few who are producing incredible art from regenerated hearts, passions, and creativity. Nevertheless, on the whole, we in the Western church are (in some ways) in a state of artistic naivety. Like apprentice painters, we proudly display our efforts not always realising that their are true masters out there, creating works that really are in another league. From where I’m looking, the old adage that “The devil has all the best music” is closer to the reality than we want to admit. We are still assuming that the music we make, the paintings we draw, the websites we design, and the art we produce is somehow on a creative par with what is happening at the cultural frontline.  This unfortunately, is not the case. The truth is that we need to begin to shift more of our attention, effort, energy and time to really become influential in culture, (rather than be so influenced by it) to really win people to Christ by demonstrating God-inspired artistic skill, ability and gifting. We have a funny but frustrating knack of becoming quickly outdated and left behind. This maligned world must know that people who follow Jesus are alive, our hearts and minds teeming with passion and creativity, inspired by a revelation of God. We are passionate, skilled, dedicated, and inspired to create wonderful art, great music, stunning sculpture etc. not inspired and induced by emotion, romance or drugs- but by the one thing that inspires more than anything else; a relationship with the One who created all things. 

 Now, your response to this might sound something like; “Cheer-up and stop complaining, it can’t all be that bad, besides your hardly the church’s answer to Michelangelo!...you miserable so and so”…A valid response this may be!! It’s true that this kind of musing could come across as a diary entry from Ebenezer himself, but I don’t want it to sound like a rant. I’m not a miser or a humbug I assure you…. And no, I’m not claiming to be the answer, but that shouldn’t nullify the validity of the contemplation. Its more of a yearning, a desire to issue a challenge for us all to at least try harder, to be better at what we put our hands to (Eccles 9:10), to get organized, to compete, to put energy, hard work, blood, sweat, tears and even money, into being great artists, musicians, designers and photographers that turn heads, that get attention, that impress, and in turn, inspire the rest of the world. My dream is that the world would feel the electric buzz of creativity coming from God’s people again.

 For too long, the world has regarded Christians as a beige collection of puny-armed, dreary, uninspired, lackluster, lifeless mopes with about as much glory as a BHS cardigan.  Unfortunately I am too often confronted with people (often our representatives in the media) that fulfill that sorry quota to the last degree. This false perception must be remedied at a swift rate. In other words I love ‘songs of praise’, but it drastically misrepresents the modern expression of Christianity that is quickly replacing the last one. The following quote from Stephen Fry is indicative of the way in which Christianity is offending people by failing to reflect the Glory of God. As people who truly believe in and have seen God, we must go to greater lengths to reflect him well in all we do; arts included.  Fry says "There was a time when he (God) had on his team people like Bach, Mozart, Michelangelo,  Leonardo, Raphael, Herbert, Swift and Wren: now he has awful, drippy wet smacks with no style, articulacy or majesty". Fry has clearly not been engaged with. And it's our fault, not his. 

The church will become even more irrelevant, outdated and unreflective of Gods glory if we continue to be lazy in our response to Jesus’ call upon us to engage with our culture. (“Go INTO the world” Mark16:15) Part of the problem is that we get so wrapped up trying to spend our lives figuring God out, that we forget to obey what he would have us do during our time on this planet. The real reason for this desire in me to see us improve as artists is not just so that we are 'hip and cool' but that we would draw attention to Jesus through our work. That we would obey his command to be salt and light; to be IN the world. 

 So please, lets take up our guitars, violins, sitars, microphones, drumsticks, paintbrushes, cameras, chisels, and laptops and start making art that seriously catches the attention of the vast swathes of lost people that have designated the church to nothing more than a weekly sing along with Aled Jones and that bird off Blue Peter.